This is something I'll do at least once a week on here. Basically, anything that strikes me unusually and unacceptably retarded, will be showcased here and ranted about for at least two paragraphs. Obviously, there are some weeks where I encounter more of these situations than others, so those weeks will earn multiple posts. Totally logical.
Just to give an idea of what I'm describing, here's a classic "Jiminy Christmas, f#$k that!" esque situation from a week ago.
McDonald's is an American institution. They alone can largely be blamed for the ever increasing childhood obesity level as well the limitless french fry filled smiles plastered across countless faces of young kids with happy meals in their laps. Over the years, Ronald and the Hamburgler have made various attempts to reign in the business the mom's who drive the Suburban's that transport this core customer group. Failed attempts include (but are not limited too) the McRibb, the Filet o' Fish, and countless other items that are certainly not what they claim to be.
Enter the newest perplexing item to grace the McDonald's menu--Premium Roast Coffee. This is more of a movement and, I mean, I get it. Starbucks is taking over the world. Oh wait, they closed hundred's of locations this past year and posted record loses. Oh well, still makes perfect sense.
If that wasn't enough, here comes the best part.
IT'S STILL MCDONALD'S. Across the street from the building where my classes are, there is a McDonald's on Broadway and Waverly. I've been told that this is one of the most successful locations in the entire franchise. So obviously, this place is pushing the premium roast coffee to rich, white NYU students like it's adderall (totally not as cool, for the record).
I was desperate. I ordered a small. My dialogue with the so called "employee." We'll call her, "employee."
ME: Small coffee please.
"EMPLOYEE": Small premium roast coffee.
ME: Yeah, sure. With half and half.
"EMPLOYEE": What's that?
ME: Coffee with half and half.
"EMPLOYEE": Half coffee half milk?
ME (defeated): Coffee with cream please.
Just...just wow.
2 comments:
you spelled degredation wrong. love you!
Shalom Matt,
Just cruising through blog world and BAM! YOUR BLOG STOPPED ME COLD.
After reading the title of your blogspot,your profile description of yourself as a NEW YORK obsessed JEW...HEEEEY you sound really cool--you really got my attention--over that cup of coffee...
Actually you seem to be really frustrated over the degredation of America's youth.Some think D promoting "F" word really helps ( no offense!)
Mind you, here you are a NYC Jewish guy- with EVRYTHING going for you. Some day you can you see yourself helping the youth of America one- by -one?
You know why the youth and everything is going down hill? They have forgot someone.
I think you know but you don't know that you have the answer.
What are your readings from your BAR MITZVAH? (IF YOU don't remember then shame on you! .. please go look them up!)Ask your parents.
Matt, Find out the meaning that Hashem PLANNED for YOUR life!
Your Bar Mitzvah readings ( chosen just for you) is where the purpose of your life is found and what you should be doing right now to prepare for the greatness. Torah says Ha Shem's NAME is placed IN you! You are marked by the G-d of Moses , buddy. He hasn't gone away at all. He never leaves. It's us who always leaves to follow after idols and strange things
Don't think I'm rude busting into your life life this. But I love getting a wake up call! It's better than going for a repetitive cup of coffee @ Mc Donny's evry a.m.. I'm just outrageously feeling where you are at right now. I know your thinking blah blah and Yeah, yeah, I know it doesn't seem like anything is happening really great in your life right now...but it is! Again, Check out your Bar Mitzvah readings and don't let them go! This is the beginning to knowing the plan of your life as Ha Shem intended. No guess work. It's the Torah etc.
King Solomon gave us a Jewish riddle found in Proverbs 30:1-4 "Who is the One who gathers the wind in His fists..and what is His SON's Name if you can tell...?
I figured this out a long time ago and it CHANGED MY LIFE! It's YOUR turn. Later Bro.
B' Seder ( are we cool?)
B'Ahavah
check out Jonathan Cahn.com and MJAA.org
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